I Miss Craig Biggio

Move over Michael Vick and Latrell Sprewell – there's a new sports bad boy in town. Unfortunately, it's our town he's in.

The Houston Astros must have thought they were getting a good deal when they signed pitcher Shawn Chacon to a one-year contract earlier this year. Despite a tendency to start well and then quickly fall apart (see his records with the Rockies and the Yankees), the Astros front office jumped at the chance to bag the one-time All-Star. Chacon worked hard during spring training, earned a spot on the rotation, and by the end of May was still holding his own in the starting lineup. Then, true to nature, his numbers started dropping. Then tumbling. And by last weekend, Wade and Astros manager Cooper had little choice but to demote him to the bullpen.

But the bottom didn't fall out until Wednesday, when Chacon refused a summons to Coop's office. GM Ed Wade confronted Chacon in the lunchroom, and somebody lost control. According to Chacon, he was sitting – quietly and innocently minding his own business – when Wade sauntered up and started yelling and cursing at him. Uh-huh.

"... So at that point I lost my cool, and I grabbed him by the neck and threw him to the ground. I jumped on top of him, because at that point I wanted to beat his (behind). Words were exchanged."

I realize I don't get paid $2 million per year, but if I was having trouble at work and was beginning to worry about my job, my first reaction would not be to throttle my boss, throw him down and start pounding on him. Oh, and then "words were exchanged." That, my friends, takes some read Chacon-es, if you know what I mean.

This, of course, is where I realize how much I miss having Craig Biggio in the clubhouse. Biggio had the reputation of being a real leader on the team, and would often take new teammate aside and "let them know" how Astros players were expected to behave. And if Bigg's soft-spoken words weren't enough, his best bud Bagwell could always come over and sit on you for a bit. I'm pretty sure they held a strict "no choking the coaching staff" policy back in the good old days.

Owner Drayton McLane has already made up his mind about the ex-starter: he won't be throwing any more hardballs for the home team at Minute Maid Park.

"We can't have anarchy," McLane said. "You can't have rebellion. If he disagreed with what Cecil wanted him to do, he should have had the courage to sit down and talk to him."

McLane went on to say, "If you shoved a policeman down or any other public servant ... can you imagine shoving a principal in a school? It was in full view of several players. Players pulled Chacon and restrained him. There's absolutely no way."

I love Chacon's parting comments to reporters:

"Maybe it shouldn't have happened," Chacon said. "But when you do those things and you're yelling at somebody and you're cussing you better know what type of person you're dealing with. If there's any regret, I just wish they had just let me alone."

In other words, it wasn't his fault. Wasn't his fault that he was pitching lousy, losing games, not focusing. He's a star, he's entitled to that starting position! And if they try to take that away from him, well, he's not responsible for what might happen.

I wonder how long it will take before he starts claiming racial discrimination.

Getting Huff-y with the 'Stros

Let's hope this is some good news for the Houston Astros:

HOUSTON (AP) - The Houston Astros acquired third baseman Aubrey Huff from the Tampa Bay Devil Rays for two minor league prospects Wednesday, hoping Huff can help revive the Astros' struggling offense. [snip]

"This will give us an offense boost which we sorely need," Astros general manager Tim Purpura said.

The 30-year-old Huff, who went to high school and junior college in Texas, hit .283 with eight home runs and 28 RBIs in 63 games for the Devil Rays this season. He has been the subject of trade speculation each of the past three years.

In his sixth major league season, Huff has a career average of .287 with 128 home runs and 449 RBIs.

The 2005 National League champions have struggled the first half of this season, with an offense that has not even been able to keep up with the lackluster performance of the slumping pitching staff. In spite of that, the Astros are actually in a slightly better position following the All-Star break than they were at this point last year, trailing the St. Louis Cardinals by only six games. Astros management hopes that adding Huff to the equation will give the team a boost as they aim for a repeat of last year's performance. Unfortunately, not everyone will be happy about the trade, as adjustments will be necessary to move the new bat into the rotation.

To make room for Huff, Houston will send outfielder Jason Lane to Triple-A Round Rock. Lane has struggled in the Astros lineup, batting only .205 this season.

Purpura said Huff's arrival could also affect third baseman Morgan Ensberg, who has also struggled at the plate. Besides third base, Huff has also played first base and the outfield.

"Obviously it will cut into (Ensberg's) playing time," he said. "We're in a position where we have to start moving forward. We can't give bats to players because they have been in that spot before. We have to get production and performance out of our players."

"We can't give bats to players [just] because they have been in that spot before." Wow, you never expect to find such words of wisdom coming from the sports arena. Sometimes I wish politics were a little more like baseball. I know of a few old-timers that have been allowed to "play the game out" just because they have held that spot for so long, even though they are way past their prime and their usefulness. (And all too often working from the wrong playbook, as well.)

'Stros Wars: A New Hope?

Breaking news from Newsday.com:

Roger Clemens is making yet another comeback with the Houston Astros, Newsday has learned. An announcement is expected as soon as today.

Clemens, 43, has signed a one-year deal that is believed to be worth about $3.5 million per month, which will probably equate to about $10.5 million for the season, depending on when exactly he returns to action.

Is it true? Can there be real pitching once again at Minute Maid Park? Not so fast, reports the Houston Comical:

Roger Clemens may very well be ready to announce he'll play this season, but Astros owner Drayton McLane and general manager Tim Purpura were still waiting today. [snip]

...McLane and Purpura said they were surprised because they were still waiting for an answer from Clemens' agents, Randy and Alan Hendricks.

"We've been standing by," McLane said. "Tim or I have talked to him every two or three days. They haven't given us a decision. They haven't said a word to us about it. That's complete news to me. We haven't finalized the deal yet nor has he told us. Boy that's total news to us."

Hopefully it's only a breakdown in communications somewhere in the Astros main office. (Like that's never happened before.)

Maybe Papa Clemens can whoop those young'uns in the Houston bullpen back into some semblance of shape, and breathe a little life back into the club.